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The Road Less Traveled: Balancing Music, Family, and Personal Growth on Day 3 of Tour

Writer's picture: Darrian DouglasDarrian Douglas

Updated: Nov 6, 2023

Day 3 on tour has me reflecting on the duality of life as a musician. The road is a mesmerizing blend of glamour, cultural exchange, and the thrill of performance. Yet, it's also a sacrifice—a relinquishing of another life that demands just as much attention and energy. Paula once said, "You can have anything, but not everything," and this wisdom resonates more deeply as I age. The road and home pull in opposite directions, each requiring a full commitment that makes balance seem elusive. I remember quizzing veteran musicians in my early 20s about how they managed to juggle a career, family, and friendships while being away for over 150 days a year. Their answers were often vague, perhaps because they were still grappling with the complexities themselves.

Musicians and athletes share a common trait: an obsessive focus on their craft. This tunnel vision, akin to Michael Jordan's legendary concentration, is essential for mastering any skill. But there comes a point when you realize that life is more than just your craft. It's about balance, something I've neglected for years. I haven't been "watering that garden," so to speak, and now I find myself yearning for the things I've missed out on.

Becoming a parent has been a transformative experience for me. While I still love performing and connecting with audiences worldwide, I've come to understand that continuing down this path would mean having a deeper relationship with my fans than with my own family. And that's a trade-off I'm not willing to make anymore.

This isn't a judgment on those who choose a different path; we all have our own races to run, our own standards to live by. But for me, the goals have shifted. I find myself on this tour, loving the experience but acutely aware of the sacrifices I'm making to be here. And, as a side note, I've also realized that I can only tolerate tofu once a year, but that's a story for another day.

The takeaway from today's reflections is simple: life is finite. Our ultimate goals should be happiness, balance, and love. In this new chapter, I'm seeking a more balanced life, one that allows for more time at home and with loved ones. So, how have your goals evolved as you've matured?

Later,

Darrian





 
 
 

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